August 18, 2010 The Day After
I am so thankful for each member of this group and for family and friends who support us every single day with love, prayer and encouragement! I don't know about Jennie and Lance, but I could not have kept my sanity throughout the past 16 months if not for all of you and of course, God. Chloe, my mom, my marriage, other family issues-all have tested me, all at once it seems. More than once, I did not have the strength, or so I thought, to pray another a prayer or think another thought. When in that place, I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that someone was praying for Chloe, for my family, for me. I knew that I did not, could not carry it all on my ever broadened but sagging shoulders. Today, I was again reminded that when the chips are down, you are there, keeping the vigil. Our little Warrior does not go unwatched, her mom and dad are strengthened each and every day with help of God. When our guard comes down a little it does not mean that we are not being remembered. Chloe's situation last night reminded us all just how special it is to live each, single day. Not one of us can be sure that we have another past this one. We MUST feel grateful and take delight in even the smallest moments each day.
Chloe is growing older, 16 months, and is just a bit naughty now...just as we would want her to be! But-Chloe has things that are very interesting to play with on parts of her body where most of us don't. She often is pulling the feeding tube out of her tummy, has just recently been very entertained by taking the trach tubing apart and even sticking her tiny finger into it! The actual removal of the trach from her airway, by her, is extremely frightening and until she is old enough to have the surgery to begin building her jaw, (about 6 yrs.) the possibilities for self harm exist. This was not a misdeed by parents last night, this was a baby in crib, settling in for the night, who literally pulled her airway out of her throat! I say these things because I do not want any one of us to become apathetic or lazy and think that Chloe and her family don't need you anymore. We need you, we need your prayers, we need you to continue to invite friends and help spread the word about this inspirational little miracle.
Today I visited my little angel bug and she seemed rarin' to go and very engaged. We played lots of horsey, I read her a book, practiced walking, played patty cake...all the things I do in a regular visit. It was different though, believe you me. As Jennie stated herself, "We might have been planning our daughter's funeral today." Nothing is the same. The siblings have experienced a near death experience and although it has been talked about and processed, that night will remain close for a long time to come! We all felt a little closer, a bit more connected. After coming home and reading all the well wishes on this Wall, I feel the same way about this group. Please stay forever. We need you, each and every one! Love and blessings! Nancy
Aug. 17, 2010 Chloe Has A Close Call
Thanks be to God for every prayer, every day. Tonight it became very apparent just how much we cannot let our guard down where Chloe and her family are concerned.
Tonight, as Jennie read a goodnight story to Kadin and Sierra and Lance was taking a bit of a breather right outside the front door on a absolutely beautiful Colorado night...Chloe was busy pulling out her trach. The ventilator alarms rang out, as they always when do when the tubing falls off, or lately, when Chloe pulls it off herself. Usually, it is not very concerning- it just needs to be placed back on and a button gets pushed turning off the alarm. Tonight, Lance checked when he heard the beeps, but Chloe was in trouble. She had pulled the entire trach tubing out of the airway, and Lance was unable to get it replaced. As he yelled for Jennie, she did not hear him, and they now understand how little is heard from the kids room to the living room where Chloe resides. She had noted the alarm, but knowing Lance was close by, gave it a bit more time before realizing Lance was yelling for her. As soon as Jen got into the room, the urgency of the situation was quite apparent. For whatever reason, the trach tube was not going back in... after three attempts, Chloe still had no airway. With Jen in the room, Lance was able to get 911 called and on the way. At this point, as Jen got to Chloe to try her hand at putting in the trach, she felt that Chloe was gone. She says she must have said to Lance that she thought that she was dead, just as Sierra and Kadin ran into the room to see what was happening. Working through the panic of a blue, limp baby taking no breaths, she did get the trach in and immediately began CPR, giving life giving breaths directly into the trach opening. Praising GOD as I write, Chloe took a breath! Soon enough, she was breathing, but her eyes remained glazed for a moment and Jennie was of the belief that she would be brain dead. Rewriting this story so soon after hearing it has brought tears to my eyes once again. Little Chloe, so fragile, so beautiful, such a wondrous little one who has graced our lives in so many ways! As Jennie held her, speaking her name over and over, she asked Chloe to just let her know that she was okay. You know what happened? Chloe looked right at her amazing mommy and signed, "Yes". This baby, who was not breathing a few minutes before, SIGNED to her ever so distraught mother that she was okay! Soon after, Jennie asked her to just do her little dance, which is really just a bobbing of the head, and she did that too!
As she stablized, the fire truck arrived...finally, and Jennie walked outside, sat...and cried and cried. Neighbors gathered who had come to grab the kids and to make sure that the outcome of sirens to the Cooper household was a positive one. Thank God that the story told tonight has a happy ending. We know that many of you keep this family in your prayers on a daily basis, we are grateful every day knowing that Chloe has inspired you enough to be remembered in your busy and hectic lives. She had made such tremendous strides the past six months, weaning from the ventilator, crawling, taking her first step, learning so many signs, remaining so very happy through every possible obstacle! We cannot forget, though, that Chloe is still on life support and that each day is a gift. A gift for each of us. Jennie and Lance feel that your prayers and the watchful eyes of angels everywhere give them their strength to do the very special job they have been given to do. Tonight I give thanks to God for giving me the most amazing daughter and son-in-law, who don't fall apart in crisis, who observe, and learn and DO WHATEVER NEEDS TO BE DONE to keep my grandbabies safe. I give thanks for 4,190 special people who are involved in our lives because of one unique and miraculous baby! Thank you God, for allowing me the opportunity to wake up one more day with all loved ones still here with me.